A time behind

Today a girl (from my university) made a compliment for my notes on Facebook. I quite surprised and startled that the last note was written from 3 years ago exactlly. What happened to make me forget this writing habit along with my emotion showing from underneath. Do I lost part of myself now? And do I become more and more vague and invisible in spritual living? The truth say yes bitterly. No mercy, no arguement better than acceptance as it's a trade-off for what I reserved my self to struggle for (money? adventure? new experience?). Thank you for waking me up and let me know a lost part of me.